FAKE NEWS UPDATE: Michael Jordan focuses competitive energy on outliving old foes
Sources close to Jordan have revealed that the consensus "greatest player of all time" and current owner of the Charlotte Bobcats is competitively trying to outlive old opponents, such as: Isiah Thomas, Patrick Ewing and even Brian Russell.
"Now that my career is over, it's all about outliving these f***ers" Jordan told reporters, speaking candidly while working up a sweat on a stair master and taking periodic, seemingly timed, sips of unsweetened green tea from an Air Jordan thermos.
"It's not just about championships and individual accolades, it's about having the richest and longest life. Experiencing everything the world has to offer, achieving greater understanding and possibly enlightenment." Jordan continued, popping some Vitamin C tablets and washing them down with more unsweetened tea.
"and I'm going to beat all of them." Jordan added, with a noticeable growl, biting down angrily on a celery stick.
Analysts have predicted Jordan competitive nature could lead to him living well into his hundreds if necessary.
(Editors note: of course this is all FAKE, NOT TRUE and a JOKE)